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Blitzkrieg!


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Day 1: Today I sit, a normal high schooler, doing my homework and listening to music. Little do I know of the series of events to come that will change my life forever.

Day 1 (a bit later): I boot up my computer, hoping to spend some quality time with my Allied comrades battling Nazis on Call of Duty 2 (which, I must say, is a spiritually cleansing experience). However, today is not destined to be spent shooting Nazis and capturing flags. Today, I must fight a more realistic war that's raging in our current era--a war of man versus machine.

Day 1 (the war begins): Windows, being the operating system that it is, takes its time to load, bit by bit. I come closer to the virtual war of my life. Upon initial start-up, a series of things go wrong, which isn't necessarily unusual for those of us who run Windows. To my surprise, however, I notice something new--a bundle of alleged spyware- and adware-removal programs running in my taskbar, none of which I installed. Harsh reality strikes. The "machines" are drilling closer to my hard drive, and I am the only one who can stop them.

Day 1 (surprise attack): As I uninstall the new programs, the machines release another breed of soldiers, completely to my surprise. These units are harmless individually but deadly in numbers--hundreds of pop-up windows. Pop-up after pop-up, each popping up more pop-ups that pop up more pop-ups than you could possibly imagine. Drastic measures must be taken before both the pop-ups and the new programs drill into my hard drive. It's too late! I'm greeted with a letter from the machines: "Your hard drive has been corrupted." On the battlefield, drastic measures must sometimes be taken--one may need to sacrifice oneself to destroy the opposition. Drastic measures are required now.

Day 2 (early morning): Deciding that severe steps are needed, I vow to destroy the machines! I struggle to reinstall my operating system, only to receive that same grim message, "Your hard drive has been corrupted." The machines have invaded every nook and corner, pipe and sewer, transistor and resistor. Not able to take the pain any longer, I relocate my hard drive to my brother's computer, where it serves as a slave to a healthy operating system. Here, I rehabilitate it to prepare for a return to the battlefield.

Day 3 (a solution): Returned to my computer, my reformated hard drive performs faultlessly on the battlefield. Though the new operating system extinguished the spyware, victory has come at a price. Megabytes of data were lost in the melee and are irretrievable, only to be replaced by newer, healthier megabytes ready for their days on the front lines. The war is not over. We must fight. We must hold ground. We must not only defend, but conquer. We must believe, and we will be victorious. Until then, I retire temporarily from the spyware wars to the virtual warfare of WWII.

Reply from the Download.com editors:

Gautham, your portrayal of a global war against spyware and malicious adware is hilarious and all too true. It often feels as if we're engaged in a never-ending war against the hackers, phishers, and other criminals who want to invade our privacy and steal our personal information. Although megabytes of data were lost on the battlefield, we commend you for your courage in the face of an impending computer meltdown and your resolve to fight malware wherever you find it.

One part of your story that's left up to our imagination is how the malicious software was installed onto your machine. Of course, the war against malware is best fought on battlefields far away from our own personal machines. Keeping the malware outside of your protected system is obviously the best way to avoid threats, and simple utilities can make that job easier. The free program SpywareBlaster is one low-budget method of defense. It simply blocks ActiveX installations. The more robust Online Armor offers real-time protection from keyloggers, host exploits, and other threats, and it offers a generous 30-day free trial.

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